gasping

I can see that you're testing me
once again, you're making me walk before I teach.

God how am I even going to make ends meet?
My mind is exhausted and blank.
I barely retain a hold on things.

I need a plan, I need the strength
I need the wisdom, and love to put it all together.

I don't have any, without you I have none.
Oh God I'm sorry it has taken this to show me, but now in you I trust.
I'm letting it go.

I go to sleep unsure of what awaits tomorrow.
still, may my heart rest in the Lord whose sovereign will governs all.

For all the mountains, for all the crazy people and the things they say...
none too high, none is too difficult for you.
None has happened without your permission, indeed even now you are in control.
Scream through the haze obscuring my sights. Call me show me. Deliver me.