Recently I've been thinking if I can radically reform my perspective on the use of my time.
If I may live a happier life if I carelessly spend my time every now and then, while being disciplined to sleep early on my weekday nights.
To spend some time in ways I would not previously, such as visiting a friend at a camp in the late hours of night, or sending some friends off at the airport early next day.
For now, it feels right. This life can really change if I substituted the old habits of time wasting for these new habits of expending my time.
In other news, I'm pretty glad about how last nights meeting went. I think we now have a workable solution for fellowship, though its implementation is no less tricky.
I think it also revealed to me some intentions behind my plan which weren't apparent to me. Some poor intentions.
The new implementation: reforming the groupings and letting the "right groupings" emerge organically is going to be so tedious to explain and so awkward in implementation. But okay, no more buts. Let's go get our hands dirty.
I wrote a note on my meeting notes yesterday. It says, "pray".
Do you know? Prayer is very telling about how much exactly a Christian cares about something (if he is any proper Christian). I realize that the things I really want God to accomplish are the ones I think about often. When I think of them I feel overwhelmed by my own powerlessness to achieve them and I quickly withdraw to pray.
However, there are things I'm supposed to care about, things like prayer requests entrusted by others to me, things like church, fellowship, friends who have yet to believe, mission trips etc. these things rarely occupy my mind.
And I don't have any persevering prayers for them either. I think it is no surprise, then, that they are not answered. For starters, it is apparent that I don't really want them and so... never truly prayed for them. Sometimes I remember them before bedtime but I'd give it a skip because I'd rather go to sleep.
So there are things we naturally pray at lengths for, and things we actually don't care about. However, I strongly believe that if we first, albeit unnaturally, pray consistently, God comes to our assistance by impressing the matter on our hearts so that we are able to pray persistently.
And so it shall be with fellowship. How will it be done dear Lord? I do not know but I'll not only ask once. I will ask and You will answer.
Saturday, June 28, 2014
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
sad story
I must blog this because what I saw this afternoon while queuing for char kway teow is really too much to bear.
So I was in a pretty long queue at the char kway teow stall when we just witnessed 6 packets of char kway teow going to this office lady in front. It was a crazy wait, I almost wanted to jump right out of the queue.
As time ticked by I got bored and I kay-poed the lady in front of me by checking out what she was doing on her phone. From what I can see, she was happily texting this guy who seems to be from her office. Okay, a colleague. She was replying quickly and there were lots of "hahaha" or even "hahahaha" which I know from research to mean more than the patronizing "haha".
She pressed the back button and then I saw this other person, whose name was baby koala, flanked by heartshapes. I can see from the tiny dp that this was a man, not a baby by any chance. Her lover. Opening the chat, I saw that baby koala sent her a pretty long message of about 3-4 lines. She glanced, her eyes staying for a second or two and she types the reply without hesitation, "thanks dear". But the moment she replies she backs from the conversation and checking her phone once again for any new messages, she locked it and kept it.
I couldn't help but feel that the thanks dear was very formulaic and lacking in authenticity... and misleading! From where I was I felt as though... 1, she'd rather have a prolonged conversation with her colleague, sparing her lover only a formulaic reply. It's like... a storm is brewing and maybe the guy is the last man on earth to know.
It reeked of the beginnings of an unfaithful relationship. I say beginnings because I refuse to accuse her colleague of anything. But... it felt like she was allowing his special position in her life to slip ever so slightly.
Ah it's too tragic.
So I was in a pretty long queue at the char kway teow stall when we just witnessed 6 packets of char kway teow going to this office lady in front. It was a crazy wait, I almost wanted to jump right out of the queue.
As time ticked by I got bored and I kay-poed the lady in front of me by checking out what she was doing on her phone. From what I can see, she was happily texting this guy who seems to be from her office. Okay, a colleague. She was replying quickly and there were lots of "hahaha" or even "hahahaha" which I know from research to mean more than the patronizing "haha".
She pressed the back button and then I saw this other person, whose name was baby koala, flanked by heartshapes. I can see from the tiny dp that this was a man, not a baby by any chance. Her lover. Opening the chat, I saw that baby koala sent her a pretty long message of about 3-4 lines. She glanced, her eyes staying for a second or two and she types the reply without hesitation, "thanks dear". But the moment she replies she backs from the conversation and checking her phone once again for any new messages, she locked it and kept it.
I couldn't help but feel that the thanks dear was very formulaic and lacking in authenticity... and misleading! From where I was I felt as though... 1, she'd rather have a prolonged conversation with her colleague, sparing her lover only a formulaic reply. It's like... a storm is brewing and maybe the guy is the last man on earth to know.
It reeked of the beginnings of an unfaithful relationship. I say beginnings because I refuse to accuse her colleague of anything. But... it felt like she was allowing his special position in her life to slip ever so slightly.
Ah it's too tragic.
Monday, June 23, 2014
What is it to you?
http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/jesus-wants-you-to-be-you
"doesn’t revel in their distinctive refraction of God’s multifaceted glory. It doesn’t rejoice in the sweet providences God grants to them. It is not grateful for the blessings of their God-given strengths. It does not want to deal gently with their weaknesses"
I chanced upon this article at a timely period of my life as I contemplate the will of God regarding the future of youth fellowship in Church.
I think I began the year optimistic (and idealistic), thinking that if we were willing, the gap between the Singaporeans and Malaysians can be bridged. I have since moved on, the experiences in the past 6 months informing me deeply about the cost of my idealism.
Today I no longer think that it is wrong for us to separate, that somehow it is a necessary calling that we learn how to being in the same fellowship together. In fact, I realized the fallacy in the argument that we learn best how to love all brothers and sisters by having an inclusive youth ministry. Today I think that this is but a short cut- on one hand I try to love those in my fellowship, on the other, I give no attention to those in east malaysia fellowship. It's hypocrisy.
I saw during my trip to Yunnan or my time with NUS vcf how much we're missing out back in church if the fellowship was of people having the same life experiences and speaking the same language. I now question if the cost we are paying today is even justified, worse, if the two peoples will benefit more from a separation.
But there was a recent frustration. The radical thought and its tendency to appear controversial has left me wary of proposing it, fearful that it will result in alienation, awkwardness and the like.
The frustration then, stems from the fact that I've come to know that many people have thought or desired this separation but have not been very forthcoming about it. Instead, when asked, they interrogate me as though they were a neutral party, hands folded, looking silently over the matter, just observing and not having a personal stake in it.
That really makes me angry, knowing that the awkwardness can be done away with if we were all going to be more forthcoming. In my head I keep wondering why God doesn't torment them with the responsibility as He does with me. Then... I read this article.
If I were to be sober and think about it... isn't there a reason why I was made the head of the ministry?
I do not rejoice in the distinction of my lot, nor of God's providence that I should ruminate over the matter. I don't thank God that I can, at will, think the matter through carefully and clearly. I do not for a moment thank Him that I am strong where perhaps the rest are weak.
Oh help me to regard my calling with that holy fear, thanking, praising and in humble execution.
Let not the thoughts of "what about him" occupy my mind, but let my mind be focused on the honor of the task.
May the work of my hands, the deliberation of the matter, bring You glory.
Thursday, June 19, 2014
Repugnance at Revival
http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/should-we-pray-for-revival
I've always felt a sense of irritation or anger when I hear people asking me, or the people around me, to pray for revival. For a moment I was self-righteous- you can pray for revival all you want, you revival needing person, I don't need any of your "you need revival" talk.
Then it became a period of self-examination and doubt. I wondered if I rejected the call to pray for revival because I despised the people who asked for me to pray for it, if it was because I doubted their character and intention. Then I also wondered if it can ever be wrong to pray for revival, I mean, how can it be that it is wrong to tell God that you want to grow? Indeed, how can we ever stop telling Him that we want to?
With that thought I entered a phase of unwilling prayer where I borrowed the strength of rational reasoning whenever I joined in prayer to ask for it. Nonetheless it remained far from my private prayer. It was kept as a merely congregational affair.
But reading this article really helped me to rethink my initial repugnance towards praying for revival. Yes, it was a lot about distrusting the intention of the people who would call for it (and I insist that I have the right to since few of them saw the need to explain themselves).
Why I formerly refused
One thing was the apparent vacuum behind their call for us to pray for revival. If anything, it always irritated me when anyone said anything without qualifications as though the thing that they were saying ought to be painfully apparent. As though there were no reasons why we should not follow the call to pray for revival right there and then. As though it will be crazy to think otherwise.
The lack displayed reasoning then leads me to think that they are some kind of sensationalists. I begin to think that "wow these guys just want spiritual high one after another". It doesn't help that the call to revival is usually sounded at a musical (saying worship may be too unobjective) high, it's sort of a catchphrase that worship leaders hang on their mouths, for use to stir or maintain a high during worship.
Why does that offend me? Well, for starters its absence in the more sober moments. Why doesn't the call come when we're sitting around during prayer meeting? Why does it not come during the quiet evening walk? Why? What is revival anyway? From what I recall, it is a period of significant trials and tribulations, when God's work and company can be clearly perceived in His deliverance, when Christians become more selfless and preach the word of God courageously.
Such a thing... isn't it only possible to truly mean it in the sober, quiet times? I imagine saying it in tears of sorrowful, trembling (because we consider how hard life will be when it comes) submission "O God you must revive us".
There is a second reason and this reason is reflected in the article strongly.
I was thinking that people are looking to revival as a solution for their lack of obedience and repentance. When the world goes to hell in a handbasket we Christians ought to feel sorry, remorseful because we stood by an watched. Such a realization leads first to repentance... doesn't it?
But instead, many have taken a liking to responding by praying for revival. I think such a response lacks the self-awareness that our slothfulness is responsible for the state of affairs. At this juncture one may say, "but we must ask God wad, only God can do it". Sure, I'm not denying that. But to arrive at the call for revival before we have walked the path of repentance is an obscene overlooking of our culpability isn't it?
Worse, it is because of the lack of call to repentance that I wonder if they're even asking for revival as a corrective action (which I find to be correct), or if they were asking for it as a "stamp of approval", a rewarding experience for a deserving church.
I don't want to be found praying for revival alongside people who are praying for it because they want to see some spiritual fireworks or alongside people who shift the blame to God (see la why you never revive us?), much less people who don't exhibit any wincing at the world of pain revival is about to bring to us.
That said, we should pray for revival. That much I agree. But first let us repent because we cannot substitute obedience with revival.
“Have you noticed how much praying for revival has been going on of late — and how little revival has resulted? I believe the problem is that we have been trying to substitute praying for obeying, and it simply will not work.”
I've always felt a sense of irritation or anger when I hear people asking me, or the people around me, to pray for revival. For a moment I was self-righteous- you can pray for revival all you want, you revival needing person, I don't need any of your "you need revival" talk.
Then it became a period of self-examination and doubt. I wondered if I rejected the call to pray for revival because I despised the people who asked for me to pray for it, if it was because I doubted their character and intention. Then I also wondered if it can ever be wrong to pray for revival, I mean, how can it be that it is wrong to tell God that you want to grow? Indeed, how can we ever stop telling Him that we want to?
With that thought I entered a phase of unwilling prayer where I borrowed the strength of rational reasoning whenever I joined in prayer to ask for it. Nonetheless it remained far from my private prayer. It was kept as a merely congregational affair.
But reading this article really helped me to rethink my initial repugnance towards praying for revival. Yes, it was a lot about distrusting the intention of the people who would call for it (and I insist that I have the right to since few of them saw the need to explain themselves).
Why I formerly refused
One thing was the apparent vacuum behind their call for us to pray for revival. If anything, it always irritated me when anyone said anything without qualifications as though the thing that they were saying ought to be painfully apparent. As though there were no reasons why we should not follow the call to pray for revival right there and then. As though it will be crazy to think otherwise.
The lack displayed reasoning then leads me to think that they are some kind of sensationalists. I begin to think that "wow these guys just want spiritual high one after another". It doesn't help that the call to revival is usually sounded at a musical (saying worship may be too unobjective) high, it's sort of a catchphrase that worship leaders hang on their mouths, for use to stir or maintain a high during worship.
Why does that offend me? Well, for starters its absence in the more sober moments. Why doesn't the call come when we're sitting around during prayer meeting? Why does it not come during the quiet evening walk? Why? What is revival anyway? From what I recall, it is a period of significant trials and tribulations, when God's work and company can be clearly perceived in His deliverance, when Christians become more selfless and preach the word of God courageously.
Such a thing... isn't it only possible to truly mean it in the sober, quiet times? I imagine saying it in tears of sorrowful, trembling (because we consider how hard life will be when it comes) submission "O God you must revive us".
There is a second reason and this reason is reflected in the article strongly.
I was thinking that people are looking to revival as a solution for their lack of obedience and repentance. When the world goes to hell in a handbasket we Christians ought to feel sorry, remorseful because we stood by an watched. Such a realization leads first to repentance... doesn't it?
But instead, many have taken a liking to responding by praying for revival. I think such a response lacks the self-awareness that our slothfulness is responsible for the state of affairs. At this juncture one may say, "but we must ask God wad, only God can do it". Sure, I'm not denying that. But to arrive at the call for revival before we have walked the path of repentance is an obscene overlooking of our culpability isn't it?
Worse, it is because of the lack of call to repentance that I wonder if they're even asking for revival as a corrective action (which I find to be correct), or if they were asking for it as a "stamp of approval", a rewarding experience for a deserving church.
I don't want to be found praying for revival alongside people who are praying for it because they want to see some spiritual fireworks or alongside people who shift the blame to God (see la why you never revive us?), much less people who don't exhibit any wincing at the world of pain revival is about to bring to us.
That said, we should pray for revival. That much I agree. But first let us repent because we cannot substitute obedience with revival.
“Have you noticed how much praying for revival has been going on of late — and how little revival has resulted? I believe the problem is that we have been trying to substitute praying for obeying, and it simply will not work.”
Tozer
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
Edge of tomorrow
Live fight, die, rinse and repeat. This movie is strangely worth watching.
Watch how attachment to the female lead ruins the main character's judgment.
watch that wonderful snigger which I heartily approve of at the end.
Watch how attachment to the female lead ruins the main character's judgment.
watch that wonderful snigger which I heartily approve of at the end.
Sunday, June 08, 2014
Calm before the storm
And so I've been telling everyone (when I'm thinking about it) that last week was the last of my holidays.
I just completed and submitted my insurance cash back form. I hope the 700 odd dollars will tide me to the next instalment of MOE allowances. I think it can. It may involved eating alone in sad fashion as I work 6 weeks @ grange road.
I put a dent in the packing for church camp because I'm really excited to go. Army has denied me my opportunity for the last one and now, at long last, I'm going for church camp again. The last one is a good 6 years ago.
Looking at the itinerary though, it seems like.. so recreational, so... not driven. I guess that's why I ought to start praying, start praying for me, for the campers to be ready to put our free time to good use (even if it means just really kicking back and relaxing).
Something cropped up in my cell group. You know, something messy and ah, you know what, I can't elaborate on it here. But my prayers are with the people involved. God you must help them all.
I'm still thinking that I may be severely lacking in work clothes and may be in need of a good haircut.
I also have to finish this 14 chapters of the methodist christian basics before I'm permitted to go for my confirmation. So this book... you're going down. I'm blitzing you in 2 days.
I'm also looking forward to the buffet tomorrow night, and no, it's not because it is a buffet. I've never been a huge fan of food. It's that the old and new comm and finally meeting again. I hope this little buffet section will serve as an encouragement for the current comm, so we'll be ready to fight a harder fight next year.
Speaking of which, I really thank God for helping lisa take the initiative last night. It's a glimpse of what I want to comm to be like. I'm also thinking of carol's reminder of Dr Liao's sharing. Dr Liao left xishuangbanna for kunming because the people there could not look to the new leader, Jaap, when he was still around.
It's a little move he called strategic... withdrawal? I remember taking a mental note back then... noting that this is perhaps a move I'll have to pull on my own committee someday.
Also eagerly anticipating the movie with desmond tomorrow. It's nice to meet up with the wankers (pardon the language, its his term) from army since i'll be giving reservist the coveted skip this year. Hope it goes well. Check out how he's been doing.
There's also the planning for the may and june babies celebrations. I don't want to let it pass like it always does. I wonder if there can be a general message I can include in the letters to the babies to just spur them on to live their lives for Christ.
Ah there is much to do... and as usual, still much time.
Help me to number my days, and in this time and age, my hours and minutes, that I may honour You with my life.
I just completed and submitted my insurance cash back form. I hope the 700 odd dollars will tide me to the next instalment of MOE allowances. I think it can. It may involved eating alone in sad fashion as I work 6 weeks @ grange road.
I put a dent in the packing for church camp because I'm really excited to go. Army has denied me my opportunity for the last one and now, at long last, I'm going for church camp again. The last one is a good 6 years ago.
Looking at the itinerary though, it seems like.. so recreational, so... not driven. I guess that's why I ought to start praying, start praying for me, for the campers to be ready to put our free time to good use (even if it means just really kicking back and relaxing).
Something cropped up in my cell group. You know, something messy and ah, you know what, I can't elaborate on it here. But my prayers are with the people involved. God you must help them all.
I'm still thinking that I may be severely lacking in work clothes and may be in need of a good haircut.
I also have to finish this 14 chapters of the methodist christian basics before I'm permitted to go for my confirmation. So this book... you're going down. I'm blitzing you in 2 days.
I'm also looking forward to the buffet tomorrow night, and no, it's not because it is a buffet. I've never been a huge fan of food. It's that the old and new comm and finally meeting again. I hope this little buffet section will serve as an encouragement for the current comm, so we'll be ready to fight a harder fight next year.
Speaking of which, I really thank God for helping lisa take the initiative last night. It's a glimpse of what I want to comm to be like. I'm also thinking of carol's reminder of Dr Liao's sharing. Dr Liao left xishuangbanna for kunming because the people there could not look to the new leader, Jaap, when he was still around.
It's a little move he called strategic... withdrawal? I remember taking a mental note back then... noting that this is perhaps a move I'll have to pull on my own committee someday.
Also eagerly anticipating the movie with desmond tomorrow. It's nice to meet up with the wankers (pardon the language, its his term) from army since i'll be giving reservist the coveted skip this year. Hope it goes well. Check out how he's been doing.
There's also the planning for the may and june babies celebrations. I don't want to let it pass like it always does. I wonder if there can be a general message I can include in the letters to the babies to just spur them on to live their lives for Christ.
Ah there is much to do... and as usual, still much time.
Help me to number my days, and in this time and age, my hours and minutes, that I may honour You with my life.
Saturday, June 07, 2014
same verse
I wake up in the morning, gingerly picking up my phone.
It is evident that nobody needs me.
My heart falls slightly but I pick it up.
My life disordered but now I know.
I've officially entered the real test
For whom will I change for?
For whom will I cling onto the lessons of the trip?
2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various [c]trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces [d]endurance. 4 And let [e]endurance have its perfect [f]result, so that you may be [g]perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
It is evident that nobody needs me.
My heart falls slightly but I pick it up.
My life disordered but now I know.
I've officially entered the real test
For whom will I change for?
For whom will I cling onto the lessons of the trip?
2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various [c]trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces [d]endurance. 4 And let [e]endurance have its perfect [f]result, so that you may be [g]perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
James 1:2-4.
I pick up this fallen heart.
I whisper these verses tenderly to it.
I estimate I'll have to strangle and shout at it someday.
Friday, June 06, 2014
I doubt it is a big surprise that every other peripheral conversation I had on the trip was centred around the topic of BGR.
It still haunts me after the trip and with every thought it cripples me. The thought of relinquishing the control and security in insisting my own way, the realization of the futility of such a mode of thinking (because after all there is no real control and security)...
Today is a free day, but a day I spent productively in the morning only to stare blankly into space in the afternoon. A day where the moments spent unwisely comes screaming back at me. The disappointment sedates me.
The phone which was more active a day ago... I rest it in peace. I let conversations die and they do.
But in my heart are incessant mutterings, a death by suffocation.
Help me to trust you dear Lord, if I trust You these things will be to me as nothing.
As nothing.
I must learn quickly.
It is in times like these that I realised that I too, have little knowledge of the bible, knowing and repeating it vainly,
Matthew 6:33
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added onto you.
I guess the misstep of the day is sitting around. Yes, God wants us to trust Him, but meanwhile, He really intends to have us put our hands to work and our minds to knowing Him. Move along tuckyan, move along.
It still haunts me after the trip and with every thought it cripples me. The thought of relinquishing the control and security in insisting my own way, the realization of the futility of such a mode of thinking (because after all there is no real control and security)...
Today is a free day, but a day I spent productively in the morning only to stare blankly into space in the afternoon. A day where the moments spent unwisely comes screaming back at me. The disappointment sedates me.
The phone which was more active a day ago... I rest it in peace. I let conversations die and they do.
But in my heart are incessant mutterings, a death by suffocation.
Help me to trust you dear Lord, if I trust You these things will be to me as nothing.
As nothing.
I must learn quickly.
It is in times like these that I realised that I too, have little knowledge of the bible, knowing and repeating it vainly,
Matthew 6:33
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added onto you.
I guess the misstep of the day is sitting around. Yes, God wants us to trust Him, but meanwhile, He really intends to have us put our hands to work and our minds to knowing Him. Move along tuckyan, move along.
Tuesday, June 03, 2014
dat stomachache
Now I'm in the common, post trip phase of dealing with stomachache. I feel like complaining but I think I'll settle for giving thanks.
I've always had a bad stomach, one which can't quite take any challenge. Seafood, shoddy food, you name it. Two notable incidences are my trip to cambodia in 09, how everything went downhill after the seafood on the 3rd day or so. My first field camp was the same too. Many boys had the privilege of not taking a dump throughout all 5 days. I had the utmost privilege of taking 7 dumps because my body couldn't adjust to the rations in time.
So this prolonged trip of 15 days... when I survive the trip without any troubles, only dealing with the troubles now as I sit in the comfort of Singapore, I'm full of thanks for the borrowed time and the mercy.
The ache is really bad though, sometimes I feel like throwing up (but it's really just a feeling). I'm visiting the toilet every now and then but somehow my bowels still feel full 24/7.
Dear Lord, come quickly to heal me. I want to train for IPPT soon!
I've always had a bad stomach, one which can't quite take any challenge. Seafood, shoddy food, you name it. Two notable incidences are my trip to cambodia in 09, how everything went downhill after the seafood on the 3rd day or so. My first field camp was the same too. Many boys had the privilege of not taking a dump throughout all 5 days. I had the utmost privilege of taking 7 dumps because my body couldn't adjust to the rations in time.
So this prolonged trip of 15 days... when I survive the trip without any troubles, only dealing with the troubles now as I sit in the comfort of Singapore, I'm full of thanks for the borrowed time and the mercy.
The ache is really bad though, sometimes I feel like throwing up (but it's really just a feeling). I'm visiting the toilet every now and then but somehow my bowels still feel full 24/7.
Dear Lord, come quickly to heal me. I want to train for IPPT soon!
Monday, June 02, 2014
The right way to do the right thing
The word "calling" has been like a keyword throughout the entire Yunnan trip. It's the word on the minds of two of my friends, shawn and Olivia.
Both of them went on the trip to discover what their calling is, a move I thoroughly approve as I deem it to be biblical. The basis for this is Romans 12:1-2
I appeal to you therefore, brothers,[a] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.[b] 2 Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.[d]
The verse stresses the need to test in discerning what the will of God is. I guess their trip this time round is indeed a taster in the world of missions, something they ought to do in the process of discerning the will of God.
This prompted me to pick up my bible to read chapter 12 today. Who knew, as I read, I read till the back of chapter 12 which talked about gifts. There was this curious portion of verses 6-8
6 Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; 7 if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; 8 the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads,[f] with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.
Aha, let me draw you to verse 8. The one who contributes is to do it in a generous manner, the one who lead is to do it in a zealous manner and the one who does acts of mercy to be cheerful as he does them.
My eyes were caught by the leading part. Being the leader of youth fellowship in church now, this verse really made me ask myself a question: have I been leading zealously, in diligence and enthusiasm?
I think I have much to work on that aspect. I picked up my phone and asked the committee out for a dinner together. I think it's been a long time since we've all met, with the Malaysian girls gone while awaiting their work permit and me, removed for 2 weeks because of Yunnan.
I ought to be more diligent in my leading. Oh God take my thoughts captive to you, that I may be thinking for, and of, them. That I no longer permit my mind to wander aimlessly.
Help me to do the right thing with the right attitude, yea, to lead zealously.
Both of them went on the trip to discover what their calling is, a move I thoroughly approve as I deem it to be biblical. The basis for this is Romans 12:1-2
I appeal to you therefore, brothers,[a] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.[b] 2 Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.[d]
The verse stresses the need to test in discerning what the will of God is. I guess their trip this time round is indeed a taster in the world of missions, something they ought to do in the process of discerning the will of God.
This prompted me to pick up my bible to read chapter 12 today. Who knew, as I read, I read till the back of chapter 12 which talked about gifts. There was this curious portion of verses 6-8
6 Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; 7 if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; 8 the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads,[f] with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.
Aha, let me draw you to verse 8. The one who contributes is to do it in a generous manner, the one who lead is to do it in a zealous manner and the one who does acts of mercy to be cheerful as he does them.
My eyes were caught by the leading part. Being the leader of youth fellowship in church now, this verse really made me ask myself a question: have I been leading zealously, in diligence and enthusiasm?
I think I have much to work on that aspect. I picked up my phone and asked the committee out for a dinner together. I think it's been a long time since we've all met, with the Malaysian girls gone while awaiting their work permit and me, removed for 2 weeks because of Yunnan.
I ought to be more diligent in my leading. Oh God take my thoughts captive to you, that I may be thinking for, and of, them. That I no longer permit my mind to wander aimlessly.
Help me to do the right thing with the right attitude, yea, to lead zealously.
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