camp

heya, back from the youth camp, of which i was the camp commandant. trust me, its scary when you've got a third eye, otherwise means that its scary when u see everything . EVERYTHING
ok im talking to ck now and he's complaining abt getting emo over his "hmm..."
and so im just acting like i dont feel anything and giving him cold (but really real) answers to his problems.
heres a brief look at camp.
screwed up but memorable ( okok im joking, though not totally)
first day it was the registration. the publicity was like i dunno, anyhow give out the name tags and then they were messed up, huiyun and eudora had to go re-sort them out.
then here comes screw-up number one,i happily skipped breakfast, and now i had a stomach ache, combined with a murderous gastric pain. so i skipped the opening ceremony, and bombed the toilet like wth? haha.. when i came back up.. the ceremony was like way over, torsten was just infront, teaching away abt the camp themme song which he wrote.
then after that we had the first talk by our very own pastor. heres the second screw-up. i wont elaborate on it, cauz its actually nothing gotta do with me...
ok after that was amazing race, torsten was kinda late to come back for the briefing, as a result, we set-off a little late. the weather was like (eat shit) so it wasnt very fun, running abt with out paper lollipop when it isnt supposed to get wet... thanks edric, for holding it most of the time...
then we went sentosa for the final showdown which didnt happen.... haha wth?!
we went back to church in a bus, not with everyone onboard, cauz we made the bus uncle wait for like.. 1 hour already..
we went back to church, some showered, some didnt. but everyone ate dinner, so who cares? haha.
after that was singspiration, ervine was giving his im-relaxed-man-u-better-relax-too-cauz-this-is-merely-a-singspiration. watever, he was leading it! u better lead better in future if u read this post.
( ok ck is trying to plan a countdown party with me now, so last minute.. haha)
ok anyway.. it was the night games.. and i tell you, xiaoke was super duper scary, show u when i get a picture of him on the blog, he seriously looked like a zombie! and wth, he is a 1.9m tall walking zombie! it was like wth?!!! run!
ok.. the rest werent that scary, cauz this was rather last minute... and the mystery was solved later, and we were like wth? thats it?!!!
ok after that was just.. supper, waste time talk talk, lightsout was at 0130
second day....
the morning was super zombified.
we went for morning devotion in our grps, and like last night's it was fruitful, truly. this is one of the main learning points. "when we do things for God, be it worship or gospel or any other service, we must remind ourselves, to do this in the name of our love for God, not for a ticket to heaven, if its for the ticket to heaven, then we're merely doing all that for the love of ourselves.. so, do we serve for ourselves, or for God, today?"
well, the talk by the pastor was again fruitful, so, guys, hav we started doing our parts and parts of the body?
though the parts are many, there is only 1 body, the body of christ.
if u do not bear fruits, u'll be removed, dried and burnt in the inferno (hell i guess...)
im sure we all love to burn things, and im so sure we dont love to be burnt either.
afternoon games were the SCREW-UP-EMO-WATEVER. im sorry for the recreation grp... its everyone's fault when things dont work, not all yours, so dont blame it on yourselves too much such that u dont deserve it. er.. haha that last part wasnt really encouraging...
the final showdown was the worst part.. ok we were like complaining that our lollipops had the least amt of paper, therefore making it the easiest to break with the waterbombs. mabel tried to defend the recreation grp by saying that they ran out of paper to make the last lollipop thick enough. from the way she said that, i could tell that she didnt quite believe wat she said either... but thats not the point, i thought that anything that could quell this nonsense was everything resembling good.

so we played the game anyway, with sucess in mind. i went and stirred up a 3 team alliance, and we ganged the first group like anything, they died in a matter of seconds. then the game masters just suddenly felt like sending members from my grp out and there were claims that we actually got hit by the waterbombs but we didnt go out. ok if u got hit by a waterbomb, u are supposed to be "dead" and get out of the arena. but the problem is, we didnt get hit by the waterbomb, i guess that sufficiently explains why we're still in the arena.

i was like reflecting on my way back to the bunk after the game ended due to the presence of soap on the floor, which the teachers-in-charge soon "assumed really well" caused some guy to fall down really badly, and was like crying away, give him a break man, he is a p6, any bad fall would hav been intolerable...
and so i was reflecting, uncomfortable thoughts soon became nightmares, nightmares slowly forced their way over the barrier and became living nightmares, and finally evolved into "realities" which was nonsense, i was merely climbing up my staircase wit and making things really shittier than they should be with my vast unstoppable creativity.
so i cant stand it. the last string of sanity snapped, (it'll join back later, and it already has...) and there was the normal big HOOHAA abt the camp commandant breaking down, which is still a big HOOHAA even though it happens every year.
btw, im really sorry mabel for not replying your nice message, no one replies messages while crying, really! (ok this doesnt sound apologetic but...ugh..)
ok then there was dinner, pizza, wow! haha but it was kinda too much and we wasted kinda too much too... did u catch that?
at night was the talent night thing, and damn it, there was no campfire. the MCs were seriously superb, we acted, did cheers, seriously guys, the cheer number 1 is not a sick cheer, it was meant to go with their little skit.
our grp won the best teamwork thing, there's nothing much abt that, haha its the IMBA grp afterall.
then it was time for reflection, there were certain remarks i kknew would come but i didnt want to hear...say, one person said this. "i couldnt turn up for last year's camp so i dont noe wat exactly happened, though i think the previous camp would've been more fun." i was like.. thanks! buddy....

well, we went planning the prayer labyrinth thing later at night, from abt 1-245.
actually i wasnt in the planning, i feel deep asleep halfway and they couldnt wake me up, so i woke up at abt 240, after having slept for abt 45mins.
haha eh, i was seriously tired ok!
then after that i went to the attic, children's chapel. they were like playing lame games there. a grp of guys and girls were like sleeping there, its undeniable how everyone hates the partition which seperated the guy's bunk from the girl's bunk, so we all slept in the attic.. haha which was such a genius idea by me.
before sleeping, i was at the playground, ck was like (i cant say exactly wat) but then he was ok once i came, though i wasnt supposed to be there. he later patched out his problem, so i was just sitting at the playground, somewhere dark with mabel, talking for more than 5 mins for the second time in my life, talked abt many stuff, abt everybody, except both of us i guess... hey it was only talking ok!
haha unknowingly time passed, it was like WTH!! its 5 in the morning already! so we walked back into the children's chapel and after a few games of card games, everyone who were still awake went back to sleep. woke up the next day at abt 9, had abt 3.5 hours of sleep....cauz i actually slept at 530 or something
everyone in the chapel were like gone except that idiot isaac who was still sleeping and complaining to me that he needs 5 more mins. previously at 815, i woke up, woke him up too, and he was like 5 mins.. and so 5mins later... haha no u mean 45mins later, i woke up... and it was 9. so i cant stand it, i pulled the blanket from beneath him and like kick him a few times, so he woke up and said something like "im still tired la, deh"
haha to hell with him la, i went back to the bunk to get my toothpaste.. after im done with my mouth i went downstairs for breakfast.
those mean idiots devoured the nice stuff, leaving me only with cow's milk and cereal, idiots! im mildly lactose intolerant!
ok the prayer labyrinth which was a last minute perfect screw up, was carried on with people dozing off everywhere in the worship hall.. haha i mean, everyone's tired and bored.. dont blame them!
so we gave out the souveniers and stuff... and we broke camp.
went tiong with edric and elton. and later met er.. eunice lee and eudora and eunice lim at tiong. we had lunch and i was taking forever to finish my bowl of noodles, i was smsing la damn it... haha
went to edric and elton's hse later... we were playing dota over bnet, supposedly to go 3 man bang other people.. but i didnt hav an account and it was so difficult to create one on euro bnet.. so... here's the solution
elton went to sleep and i used his account. we played a freaking long match where edric was ogre magi who multicasted like crazy, and i was priestess of the moon and ended of with retarded items... BoT, myjollnir, eye of scadi, aegis of the immortal, divine rapier, and S&Y.
i figured my way home.. and amazingly the bustop had like.. 147?! i was super lucky, direct bus home... when i reached home, i skipped dinner, too tired, messaged a few people, and i was in bed, drifting far away into my dreams.. but no, i had a dreamless sleep, woke up, and typed this insane retarted post which is like so super duper long.. haha
so thats that, pictures some time later...

my IQ?

wow thats my IQ? lol ok watever, i already knew that i was a genius, so this is really redundant..
haha

so much for that white christmas

ugh.. lol i didnt get to go snowcity afterall, no white christmas... damnit!
haha ok er.. i'll be brief. we went to snow city, reached at 1315. and the next available session was like wth?! 1545? so we were like...
heck, lets go jurong entertainment centre.
it was drizzling on the way there, and melissa was so sua ku she didnt noe how to get to JEC frm science centre.
ok.. we had jap at KOBA. but the spicy ramen was like so potent my stomach was giving me trouble a little later.
we went up to the skating ring. is was like flooded with people there, how idiotic...
so we just sat at the side, took dumb photos. hm.. haha
i wont post it here, so if mabel, congkai or melissa wants any of them,
pls just msg me on msn. congkai and mel would just hav to add me first, lty7791352@hotmail.com

lol

it isnt that hard

it isnt that hard, to be someone on your blog, talking abt God and stuff
and be a monster in real life.
it isnt hard to say that some girl sucks.
when u suck as well..
it isnt that hard, to convince yourself that you're right
it isnt that hard to lie
it isnt that hard tolie to yourself, either
it isnt that hard, to be nasty to certain people,
yet be a gentle angel, fluttering above my head
it isnt that hard....
but it was supposed to be.

it isnt that hard for me either, since i am kinda bad mouthing someone now. we reason that its ok when we utter cold hard facts, we reason that its ok, its reasonable.
isit?
i dont noe. i mean . i dont noe you, i didnt want to work with you.
persuaded i agreed. i thought u were like fun and all, funky and such.
but i guess u are kinda overboard. What kind of nonsense was that? reasoning and defending yourself like as if u were right. u noe who u are, cauz no one can do things without watching if anyone was watching, im watching mind you. and i regret my choice. i mean. who are u to comment on the product of my sweat and blood, who are u to think, or claim something u didnt do as a replacement for something u must do.
shit you, wake up. damnit.

well... that was some load of emo nonsense, it reminds us not to act hypocritically and dont defend yourself when you're in the wrong, dont be, a moron. just take it, dont think abt nonsensical matters such as your own pride and all that kind of nonsense shit.

its just shit

and you could see it in my soul
i said all the words i'd ever know.

all it did was.
nothing. i'd sell who i am off to get who u are.
maybe, maybe im too good for my own good.

ok yes, i havent blog for days. but i do hav a reason damnit!
haha look, i went for choir performance 3 times already, once a taman jurong cc ( a pretty nice community club) paragon (er.. wait u dont noe where that is? then i guess i dont noe how to go home either).
and finally, tanglin halt CC, which was pretty.. haha pale in comparison with the other two locations, but thats not the point. where we're going, we glorify God, we beautify our environment, our environment will not dictate us.
thats not all, i made my IC, i did alot of camp stuff, i watched "night at the museum" which is a shittily funny show which is like lame and all, but definitely worth the watch.
ok look i've just literally vomitted everything out, dont u think its like time for me to sleep? i think so, i've got another big day tomorrow! argh shoots i forgot
i cant sleep unless i receive the new groupings for camp... arghhh im being tormented da.. nah night and night

my christmas?

all i want for christmas, was to be relaxed, peace.
all i want for christmas..
all i want for christmas? who am i to want anything for christmas?
cauz christmas isnt mine.
what am i supposed to give on christmas?
gold?
perfume?
immitating the wise men uh?
what, do i give for christmas, so that
this would really be christmas
i dont noe,
cauz
somewhere deep inside me is where christmas really starts
looks like, my gift to God.
is my heart, given to God.

all i need for christmas is. Love actually.
haha seen that somewhere on the TV? i think so.
lets look at my hectic timetable
today- camp meeting, xiao ce zi, CCIS practice. ( supposedly homework tooo)
thursday- homework in the morning, then recce with the kangle. CCIS at night
friday- make my ic which was delayed for 2 months already. be my bro's fashion advisor and follow him around so that he wont look ridiculous during christmas.CCIS at night
saturday- hw and choir practice ( or isit the CC thing at tanglin?)
sunday- church, movie date with my cousin and mabel (hope she's going) and then finally at night, my friend's hse, christmas party!!

nothing

some people say that the happy people u see, are just the ones whom u didnt see in sorrow. i say.....
heck la wat the hell come up with this kinda of nonsense for wat
lol im just glad that im a happy person to most people. obviously those who read my blog think that im leading a terrible life, eating shit everyday, falling down face-flat on every slippery floor, people telling me to screw off everywhere and watnot.
im tell you, i blog abt emo stuff because emo stuff sell better. this english tuition teacher, my bro's, not mine. said that, when u write an essay, be clever and write a sad story. dont go " i love happy endings" and go try writing a nice, happily ever after kinda nonsense, cauz u wont score. just imagine cambridge markers as sadistic emo people who feed of the misery of others
of course he didnt mean the cambridge markers part, he'd hav gotten sued for slander!

the rain

rain, has many adverse effects on human emotions.
spirits down and going. drown six feets underground in the rain.
a man who is upset, is rain bids him to suicide.
low spirits, lack of self worth, worthless and light, flung about in the rage of the winds, softened and broken by uncountable numbers of raindrops, slamming their fullest onto the already swollen and breaking soul.
someone feels so useless in the rain, even wat he is to himself now, is broken to pieces.
spirits high in an atmosphere of intense romance. rain pours, but all is happy to be together, squeezed in the cozy shelter, with the steady beat of the harmful rain away, the cooling breeze rushes in, it doesnt matter, they've got each other.
adrenalin coursing the veins of a man, the intense heat of game he is partaking can never be drown by the pellets of freezing cold droplets. the chill penetrates him inside-out.threatening to bring him down. No, this game must be won, the rage and desire to win ignites in him, he'd pay the penalty later, but he is glad, rain cant ever stop a man from being a dream chaser...
i guess, the rain is merely a catalyst to our emotions, heightening, or bringing them down to record low levels. it may be there, we could always choose to ignore it. So, when rain comes, what would you, do?

no tittle

ah wat am i supposed to blog inthis boring holiday, where my timetable screws up everyday....
ok lets look at the geog project. wet rice cultivation. sounds ok.. wait the second part, in peninsular malaysia!?! wahhh how are u supposed to specifically find anything abt that?
arggh to top that off, there's nCC orientation skit practice, though im totally grateful that the rest of the stuff, like CCa booth and stuff were all done and now i only hav to do the skit well
secondly, i dunno how fiona got herself so really ill she has a 2 weeks MC, so there goes 1 team member.... oooooh this sucks
ok went for recce to sentosa on thursday, boy was it a torture, i went sentosa, with only like.. 13 dollars? how did i do that? well i dunno, heres the main part, i came back with $5.. which meant that i only spent $8, in sentosa? now u could like almost guess how bored i was, dragging my feet all over sentosa's lanes and roads.
ok lets see... friday was...morning till afternoon NCC skit, afternoon to abt 7.40 pm doing the puzzle thing for the youth camp... ahhh! for 3 hours i only cut out 2 limbs and puzzled them. thanks mabel for the help, though u only managed to get out one puzzle in abt 20mins... haha be sure to finish the whole thing properly hor.
now theres this voice instrumentation thing on sunday, and im so screwed for the harp. looks like life sucks when it sucks - blatant logic.
ok looks like i still hav abt 90 more questions for math and thats not all, i have my geog essays, and i dont even hav my question paper.. oh oh this sucks...
going to shop for clothes later.. sheesh might as well dont go if my mum gives me a puny budget

new phone!

ok for today's session, lets look at my new phone.. haha its the hm.. yeah it owns!

hahah waaah look at it! ok actually there's nothing much else to say.. haha watever. thats that, signing off already.

tuck

nonsense

i think alot, but sometimes i rather not thing. im confusing and i beat abt the bush, so when people read the emo posts they thing its them wherre my finger points. nnnahh relax!
ok today's luch sucked.. i mean.. salmon? oh i hate salmon, they taste better when raw, cauz thats when they're almost tasteless...
going to take video in church later... hmm.. i need a heart of perseverance and patience..

timetable

yes, the timetable went off today, aunty esther didnt want a video taking today, that is sooooo off, cauz it ends up that today didnt fit into the timetable. so darn it, its 1 day off the timetable and everything will just screw up.. and damn u wilson and fiona! why project and my hse? u lazy fools shouldnt choose my hse just because its near the school!@$%**&
ooh why is that part "linked" damn the web browser thinks that its a email address.. lol
ok wait i bet i freaked u guys out. its like
tuck yan and timetable.... no relationship leh.. yes, very smart, really, i cant believe that i did a timetable either, i must be like moron-ated (marinated)
ok watevr this is getting awfully random...
yes, i still hav a hundred math questions to do,...
so i guess i'lll just fly away now.

shit this sucks

as i've said, thousand times before, life sucks.
you are singing a song, its where u hav to sing a note once every 1/12 of a bar. watever it is, it is partially my fault that its off beat, but thats not all, i get my note from u both, damn it, sing it properly, im tired of putting a smile on and convincing mysself that its my fault, when it isnt totally!
screw, life sucks. If u dont stand up and stand out, u get drastically overshadowed.
i dunno why im typing all these nonsensical rantiings, but sometimes, life sucks so much u cant really understand, why why why?
ok i'll keep this a little more, cauz i have to say this, but then, i guess i really hav to, since its been here, rolling abt the bottom of my heart. jumping here and dere, whenever i see...
you. im sure u noe, abt how i feel, i almost see you everyday, a slow crawl over a long way. you noe that we cant really talk, cauz we both noe abt wat im writing here. u said that he was waiting, u said that u were sorry, and then, wat abt me? as long as he had been waiting, so have i. Are u sorry? dont be.cauz its my fault, anyone will be displease that i've held on so long, and havent been making my move, but u noe me, u noe that im not getting into anything untill im at least done with my A's, or a IB diploma... i cant make my move, cauz it just wont be good, it wont turn out well. it wouldnt.
someone who reads this might think.
watever, signing off, a totally capped up person

hehe im being gay, forgive me

So, how are you..whatcha up to?
-blogging, or u wont see this
Oh sounds like fun...so...what's your name...?
-tuck yan ( the great is my er... english name)
Hahaha your name sucks...
-haha and u dont even hav one
Eh whatever. So what's your favorite band?
-none, bands all suck balls
Cool. How Tall you you?
-wat you you, if i got it right, im 168cm
How many pillows do you sleep with?
-2, you?
Do you really care what people think?
-if i consider them people, yes i will care
What kind of music do you listen to?
-none, maybe classical
Have you ever met Abe Lincoln?
-er.. might, in heaven
Aw You're no fun! And don't call me a bitch!
-i wont, cauz u are a guy and that makes u a BAS third
Haha, anyway, what color hair do you have?
-its black, and its red infront ( its natural damnit )
Cool, so I assume your taking this because your bored right?
-loser, wrong, its because of bad influence from blogs
That's what I thought...Loser...
- wat the hell? how did u guess that u were a loser?
Haha, just kidding. What color are your eyes?
-they are brown, duh, no one has black eyes btw..
So, who do you have a crush on?
-u sure u want to noe? ask my frens wil you?
Why is the sky blue, and don't give me some scientific explanation mister..
- the sky is blue because of the reduction in frequency of the whitelight when the light passes through the atmosphere, resulting is a different "coloured" light.
What are you listening to now?
-noise from the Tv
How about now?
- * repeat*
Cool...
-ice cream/? the air conditioner isnt switched on u noe...
Are you wearing rings?
-onion rings maybe
Can you loan me 100 bucks?
-when u loan me 101bucks
Oh ok...What kinda clothes do you wear?
-why? getting clothes for me during christmas? i dont noe you!
Why did you answer that?
-dunno, why did u ask that, u moron
Haha ok. Um...Best Green Day album?
-none, green day sucks balls
And if you don't like them, why!!!!
- wats the deal, ask anybody they'll scream in your face, the same thing
Uh well fine then!! Few more questions. Is that ok with you?
-if not why did i copy and paste the whole damn thing?
OK moving on...What grade are you in?
-no, piano grade 3, im secondary 4 not any sissy grade system u hav in the united states
Do you like me?
-no, unless u are a gay i cant, but i hate gays, so either way its no
Hehehe ok....
-ok yourself, trust u to ask this kinda nonsense
Well bye, thanks for wasting your time!!!
- i realised, before u leave, can u tell me your house address? i would LOVE to burn it down.

er. he left... haha

hehe im being gay, forgive me

So, how are you..whatcha up to?
-blogging, or u wont see this
Oh sounds like fun...so...what's your name...?
-tuck yan ( the great is my er... english name)
Hahaha your name sucks...
-haha and u dont even hav one
Eh whatever. So what's your favorite band?
-none, bands all suck balls
Cool. How Tall you you?
-wat you you, if i got it right, im 168cm
How many pillows do you sleep with?
-2, you?
Do you really care what people think?
-if i consider them people, yes i will care
What kind of music do you listen to?
-none, maybe classical
Have you ever met Abe Lincoln?
-er.. might, in heaven
Aw You're no fun! And don't call me a bitch!
-i wont, cauz u are a guy and that makes u a BAS third
Haha, anyway, what color hair do you have?
-its black, and its red infront ( its natural damnit )
Cool, so I assume your taking this because your bored right?
-loser, wrong, its because of bad influence from blogs
That's what I thought...Loser...
- wat the hell? how did u guess that u were a loser?
Haha, just kidding. What color are your eyes?
-they are brown, duh, no one has black eyes btw..
So, who do you have a crush on?
-u sure u want to noe? ask my frens wil you?
Why is the sky blue, and don't give me some scientific explanation mister..
- the sky is blue because of the reduction in frequency of the whitelight when the light passes through the atmosphere, resulting is a different "coloured" light.
What are you listening to now?
-noise from the Tv
How about now?
- * repeat*
Cool...
-ice cream/? the air conditioner isnt switched on u noe...
Are you wearing rings?
-onion rings maybe
Can you loan me 100 bucks?
-when u loan me 101bucks
Oh ok...What kinda clothes do you wear?
-why? getting clothes for me during christmas? i dont noe you!
Why did you answer that?
-dunno, why did u ask that, u moron
Haha ok. Um...Best Green Day album?
-none, green day sucks balls
And if you don't like them, why!!!!
- wats the deal, ask anybody they'll scream in your face, the same thing
Uh well fine then!! Few more questions. Is that ok with you?
-if not why did i copy and paste the whole damn thing?
OK moving on...What grade are you in?
-no, piano grade 3, im secondary 4 not any sissy grade system u hav in the united states
Do you like me?
-no, unless u are a gay i cant, but i hate gays, so either way its no
Hehehe ok....
-ok yourself, trust u to ask this kinda nonsense
Well bye, thanks for wasting your time!!!
- i realised, before u leave, can u tell me your house address? i would LOVE to burn it down.

er. he left... haha

shit

they say that when u serve God, thats when the devil attacks you.
how true.
was doing some camp stuff today. my bro had to say something as ass as this. " hey dad said that the mouse is screwed up, due to clicking too much while playing games"
i couldnt disagree more, cauz mouse is meant for clicking, not for spoiling pettishly under a few little clicks, so i said " he's just being unreasonable"
and bro had to come and continue with this unreasonable nasty shit " anyway, next time he asks or scolds, i'll just refer it to you"
i mean its like WTH! and then he proceeds to bull shit and crap, and just give me alot more unreasonable crap.
then finally i thought, fine, let him tell dad watever he likes, a mouse spoiling from clicking too much is like keyboard breaking down from blogging too often. and so here i am, bloggin this nonsense after im done with the church camp meeting agenda.. wat to do? life sucks.
i shall sidetrack a little to this chain mail.
"let see the devil try to break this powerful prayer chain"
oh yeah? if im not wrong, chain mails are used to obtain email adresses, which are then harvested and sold in markets to companies so that they can either send their porno mail or advertisements to people who simply forwarded a email just because the mail made people who break it appear like they are the devil's fanatics.
screw it, if ppl are out there, trying to make money out of christianity, i say screw off fools!
ok lets say something which wenjie would love to say all the time. dont be mean to any people, cause being mean means nothing, and since it does nothing, why be an idiot an do something for nothing?

posting for fun

yes, i havent been blogging for like numerous days, sorry la! I've not been going through eventful days, i have been staring at my homework, without displaying the effort to put it right. ok i already ran out of things to right, so i shall start being gay and rant and complain and be a little kiddo.
first, the church camp, publicity! hey you all are responsible for numerous matters, wakey! pls its only 3 more weeks to camp, without a good effort from you all, things won't work out, no no

second, geog project! oi wilson dont lidddat leh, hurry tell me when u cannot come so we can settle on some sexy date to do the thing... and wait.. which question did we choose? Zzzz

third, my ic! its not done, and its just going to take up one whole chunk of my day. this sucks, why isit so tedious to go do an ic?

fourth, homework! ok this sucks, at the beginning of the holidays, there was 100 math questions, now, still 100 questions!

fifth, this sucks. ( no more!)

ok now that u've witness the lack of content in my blog, why dont u fill it up by dating me out?
ok watever gtg, cauz im murdering myself over typing this shitty post.

fsdgfgdgd

after the craziness, reality steps in, it places a halt, it stops the fun, it makes u feel, you.
and that really makes me feel useless, so empty, so nothing.. ok fine before i get emo, lets have some... fun!
lets see, the programme for yesterday was... kids' camp, kena multiple gang bangs at the science center's waterworks, lan game, boomerang rescue, lost and found hp, and finally, climbing over the road's fencing.
kids' camp was so so, i still could not bring myself to accept those isolent p2s, full of themselves and kinda almost screwed my boomerang upside down...
ok we went to science center.. and i could already hear the "boooooo!" yes i noe the science center sucks.. but then.. the waterworks own man! so watery, so fun.. playing with all the kids and then they were like.. ganging all the youth helpers, stalking about in packs and dragging us into the water fountain and stuff.. haha those poor fools, i could wrestle with more that 6 of them in a go. then disaster striked.. i fell on some guy's stomach, he was like.. curled up and rolling about miserably... ugh.. wat hav i done?!
ok after the camp was over, we went and had this crazy idea.. go play lan.. so, fullfilling it, we played abt 2 hours, frm 6-8.. ugh.. boy were i hungry!
but instead of going home straight away, torsten had to be stupid and threw the boomerang up the bus-stop.. the thought of going back to the lousy science center to get another one simply just brought me to tears.. so i thought decisively... "guys, we're gonna rescue the boomerang" haha and can u believe it? i managed to get a ladder from a nearby shop.. and torsten went and climbed up the bus-stop.. there was just this huge crowd of onlookers.. but heck, we arent breaking the rules, just maybe, we could have broken the headlines... haha so after we got the thing down, we were dying to get home...
on the bus was havoc.. haha we were playing the boomerang at the second floor..
when we got of the bus, torsten was like oh shit oh shit.. then he tried to memorise the bus's number... which was like so surprising and watnot.. this could have been a crazy day, but watever was that for?
oh.. the great reveal, he kinda lost his handphone, the poor thing... haha
and wat?! it was actually in his bag... arent u a genius in keeping your stuff, torsten?
ok look, words cannot do this injustice, but i dont have a picture.. so.. bear with this.
the road had been fenced up, just today.. in the afternoon i guess...
deciding that climbing over the fence would require less effort than walking a distance down the the not-in-operation-YET traffic light, we climbed over the fence, just to see a police car which isnt a police car zooming by...
hmm.. ok recalling the events just made me estatic enough to dont get emo.. so i guess we're kinda lucky here, arent we???

random

i really havent been blogging, so please, dont sue me.
NCC camp was kinda tiring for some of us.. i guess its the lack of consistency in our own personal trainings, resulting in low stamina..
finally got a taaste of being in part D. no stand by bunks, no demanding drills.. ok so, how did we even get tired? like i tagged somewhere, the camp was suspiciously murderous.. ugh... ok anyway, been really busy, and sorry fiona for being unable to meet on monday, i swear i had a crazy headache!
ok yesterday was pretty exciting, i got to try to fabricate a prayer walk, i hope it was sucessful, but im sure i've got lots of space to improve.
things have been getting crazy, i guess im just getting older without realising it. suicides, group backstabs, hectic timetables and so much more to add...
ahh lets be honest here, since this is a blog.
i'll be honest.... i havent really touched my hw..
this sucks, im going to die... ahhhhh!!!
btw, the third side for tiberium wars has been revealed!!
" and then.... they came"

just some pretty random stuff

ok today was second day jobbing in crescent girls school. it wasnt every fun, since the girls were like so guy deprived... i mean.. u are carrying something, u turn around.. and wooo? so many people looking at you, and they cant be guys, cauz its a girls school..
ok then the first day's lunch was like.. i mean the noodles sucked... haha and the second day's noodles, sucked.. in all the soup and became so soggy and wet and fat and everything, lets be honest, digusting.

heres the shitty part in today.was going to my fren's hse to celebrate her birthday. In the morning, i asked my bro to meet me and torsten at redhill mrt station at 1630, otherwise 4.30 o'clock at the sensible time of the day. well, we reached the station at 420 after our job and we were like waiting for my bro. unknowingly, my bro had already gone somewhere far, yes.. he was already at around eunos paya lebar there...
and we were fools waiting abt at redhill.. to think that i actually got worried abt my bro and stayed waiting like so kinda toot.
and then at 530 i couldnt stand it anymore, yes one of the reasons was because i am impatient, but the other one is because i've been staying on my feet the whole day and my legs died, so i couldnt stand it.
and it obviously refered to the ground in that case...
ok anyway, reached her house, helped out with the dinner, both preparations and eating... heheh stop laughing
ok we went up to the apartment, and they just started watching high school musical and i was just getting dried up.
now everyone has left, im the only one left.. haha
so im blogging away at her house, cauz im staying over.
tomorrow is shooting competition, and her house sure is nearer to the NEE SOON camp then my hse is, explaining why i landed here, after a stroke of genius planning.
haha..i hope the bed is comfortable.. lol or else how i sleep? without a good sleep, how i aim? without a good aim, how to shoot? without shooting properly, how to win?
how how how? oh sorry, my friend's speech is getting into me.
haha how how how?
well, while im typing, my dear fren is making alot of noise at the back..
" the snow.. waah!" " but they are damn pro"
" the pro guy came between us and jumped over, and continued skating.."
" he didnt jump that high, he did some u noe that thing"
" we saw some beautiful angmohs"
" we must wear long socks next time, or else will have blisters"
"20cent coin la, ask isaac."

haha.. ok.. this is super random and lame...
lets end this, with the great adventure and mind boggling trail today, in an attempt to stay over and have a good shooting competition tomorrow.
first, woke up, packed my uniform, grabbed my beret and stuff...
second, called my bro to get boots for me, cauz torsten "ass-ed" and then forgot to bring his.
third, called my dad, left my speccs at home, he came to meet us in redhill, then he was saying " ahh... i was sleeping and u woke me up, so now im just going to go town to walk-walk.." and he went vivo city..
thats really a walk- walk!
fourth, "my bro panic".. i went and bothered neo abt my boots, but in the end, my bro turned up, so... no worries?! no no... the boots were mismatched! one was full leather, another is half leather.... LOL, luckily its a shooting competition, not drills or some best uniform jazz....
lastly, the no ear plugs complication. ive got no comments, cauz it isnt solved, and im dead meat. without the earplugs spells without ear drums.
i mean... i even doubt the spelling part, u cant spell too well, without first being able to hear wat u are spelling, right?

doulos

doulos, and i think i spelt this right is the... ship which was built 2 years after the titanic, and didnt sink like an idiot.

therefore, it broke the guiness world record for the oldest, still servicing ship. ( its so darn small, its a boat, i dont care..)

well, actually i didnt do much, coope some of zhong jie's icecream, bought a book called " if jesus were your counsellor"

well, no one fits this any better than jesus, God himself.

ok so now im blogging abt this trip which i went yesterday and some 7 years ago... well thats mostly because of some idiot called mabel, who couldnt view a .jpg format picture cauz her computer is hopelessly imba, too lousy.. haha.. sorry abt this, but in my blog, im the king.. heh heh heh.

ok so here goes, i'll start with the proof!

waah wat is this? the stern!

haha/.. really, im sorry for looking like an idiot at the side.

ahhh my good fren, called

snow man...

ok zhong jie is the dude

on the right, he is already.. 28? but he keeps insisting that

he is a sec4 or something.. haha.. yeah, he is a teacher, and i think

he teaches sec4 as well..

anyway thats it....

shitty

time is running short... hearing from my friends yesterday, i guess its rather impossible for me to make it into RJ... so does that mean that it'll be AC where i go?
i hav an idea though, i might go ACS(i) IB... hm.. hows that now?
who noes, its obvious that a diploma is better than a A'level, so....
well i dunno, im damn scared, i dunno where im going, im lost.
God help me, be my counsellor.

ok that was hell emo

ok that was emo, so lets skip that thing if we could.
ah today went to play lan with keith, wj, david, mence and my bro.
bro left early for some soccer game. so we continued and fooled about.
well.. life is getting abit of sian now, losing my purpose.
man.. ok anyway, my cousin was saying how her bro looks so charming
( like me) when he gets into his formal clothings.. heh heh....
ok anyway, out of point, as in totally
ok.. after the lan we went to eat some malay stuff, they all had nasi
lemak, so i went to extra and bought mee siam instead...
ah it was ok, but kena stomachache.
then later we decided to go tikam the one dollar thing... it was for the magnet... ah, but i got some shitty lousy dolphin floating in a cap..
AHHH! ok i could've placed that damned thing here, but.. wheres my camera now?!
ok aanyway, still pretty exhausted from the chalet, gtg sleep, already!

came into my life

came into my life, touched my heart. now u left, smashed my dreams
into countless pieces.
came so close, nudging me. i couldnt take it, i had to act like i could.
you liked me, and i knew. but i didnt do anything, for nothing was
everything i could do.
looking at you, i knew why i liked you. perfect for me, but now.. probably not. you and your life of luxury, your ring of friends and attention
me? none...
i dont need those, i only need you. some guy came in, rewrote this story.
broke your heart, and u then sealed it from me.
unfair? i dont noe, everything you do is fair, how can u ever be wrong?
sarcasm u claim, im under your trance.
but wats the point, i wont have u, for u didnt want me.
under the tree, the raindrops tapped heavily. my heart sank
my dreams washed away.
would waiting for u a few more years, change the circumstances?
i wished it could, but deep down, i knew it'd never.
i wouldnt wait 2 hours for my Amath paper to start,
but i would wait 2 more years for you to come back.
please, if i could still be the one for you...

nothing

ahh.. im finally back frm the chalet..

those idiots pangsei me, jacon and daniel.. they went for lunch at tiong bahru!!! WAHLAO EH

ok anyway... kinda tired, let me show u something, u might want to see..

corks... ( boooooo...)

oops... yes we did drink sth.....

nothing beats 4 gays ( and 1 guy, me) squished into a small

pool like this...

row 1: robin ( sorry abt that cut-off), me, wenjie, keith, jacon

nat, sihui, yiling, fiona.

back row, row 2, watever:caleb, robin choo, fern, shuyi, alicia, lennard

brian..

hello

hey guys, this will be my last post untill thursday..
firstly, i'd like to say HI! to the ipoh ppl, had fun?
ok u see, im going to some insane chalet today, its monday to thursday.
heres wishing for a conflict-less chalet, and that everyone will have fun!
ok well, i must rmb to do my hw... or else im just going to die, the holidays are abt to get tougher..
so.. yeah ok, BYE!

lets get emo

lets get emo... LOL wats with this emo craze?
first it was the haze, now its gotten into our heads
as a result, we're currently emo-ing around and behaving like idiots.
ok so no more emo.. but.. didnt emo as in emotions make the world go round?
i dunno.
so anyway, heres a list of things to do in the holidays.
1. sit down and think abt how to win a shooting competition.
2. figure out how to spend my time, so that teachers dont get to scold me next year
3. fix my additional mathematics and physics.
4. get a job? i hope it'll be slack, if i get it
5. learn piano... ( again.. aww.. wat abt power rangers now?)
ok i quit piano when i was 8 because i wanted to watch my power rangers
instead of "wasting" my time looking at black and white stuff.
6. grind my guts for chuch camp.. the theme is 1 body many parts, hav u done
your part, anway.
7.catch every single droplet of info during dom 7 camp, so i can fare better when
our chuch choir has its anthems.
8. Play LAn and kick BUTT?
9. play ATC raycrash with keith online and give him some unpleasant surprise.
10. go for a lap top hunt.
11. save up and buy dawn of war: dark crusade.
12. buy more clothes
13. new pants? im like stuck with single handed countable amount.
14. buy haribo for people who look like snails
15. christmas gifts hunt.
16. day dream
17. mundane tasks
18.uhuh i guess i only hav 17..\
19. 18 isnt counted
20. 19 isnt counted
21.20 isnt counted
22.21 isnt counted.
23. etc, this list goes forever.

My personal profile.
Utmost in your mind is success. You are constantly seeking stimulation and a life full of experience. You are trying to 'grow' and above all you need to develop freely and to shake off the shackles of self-doubt. You are an enthusiastic individual, full of life with the desire to live intensely. You like contact with others and are enthusiastic by nature. You are receptive to anything new, modern or intriguing. Your interests are many and you are likely to expand your fields of activities. You are optimistic about the future and you deserve every success because deep down you are a 'winner'.You are lazy - you dream of a peaceful, calm, uncluttered and uncomplicated life. Your ideal would be to share a permanent base with some person or persons who would be able to demonstrate on-going love, peace and security.You feel that you deserve far more than is being attributed to you, but there is no-one to whom you can turn to for sympathy and understanding. Your pent-up emotions and inherent egocentricity make you quick to take offence, but as matters stand you realise that you will have to make the best of things as they are.You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.You don't like authority and you rebel against all forms of limitation. You are your own person and you intend to stay that way and to get on in the world simply by your hard work and determination.


ok.... now do i sound like a rebel or a terrorist? dunno, what abt you? are u?
why not check this web out? http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/index.htm?

emo post, a terribly lovely nightmare

in the nightmare.
u were shot.. ugh why?
because of him? you would do that?
three shots sank into you.. the face twisted with agony.
out from your mouth gushed a pool of blood.
u would do that.. for him?
ran beside you, u looked at me.
in agony u smiled.... your face was drenched in sweat.
looking weak, but yet looking strong.
i felt like laughing, and i did.
u laughed, and with each laugh, u spilled more blood.
we laughed, though u were hanging by the edge of your life,
i guess that was my happiest moment in my entire life...
and now, awoken to the painful reality.

the lines on our graphs

"maybe we'll be like the two lines that would intersect and if we are parallel, we can be the same line and intersect from the beginning to infinity."
ok, lets just hope that our parallels arent going to be y=mx+ c and y=mx+d
if its that way, then im afraid...
the lines have never met, and they wont, never ever.
however, if it would be two lines of different gradient, i hope
they'll meet soon, in due time.
so that's all, let the draw-er of our graphs decide this fate.
be it so close but so far, or that our time is not yet, we'll all leave that there.

help me

your smile...
i didnt catch it then, some nearly 1.5 years ago.
i wont catch it anymore, since soon there will be no more.
it seems drastically impposible, to talk those nonsense
it wont be the same, some "heyy" would never fill up that space
how about running to your computer, though its a mile away
just to check the conversation, and all the talk you gave?
what about being honest, its better than your cold facade
the truth is buried, far from either of us, i dont even know, if you'd know
but u think u know, and you run. What you dont, is just about everything
i lied, and u think i am who i lied that i am
im not.
this fabric is torn apart, be merciful will you?
you are tearing out the very heart of mine.
so, am i going to have you back? yes?
as a? memory or just simply, the real, solid you?
like-d me uh...
what abt,
like me now?

God help me, fix this choice

hello, back again.

ahhh.. osrry sorry.. i havent been blogging, at all.
it isnt a sin, but im feeling uneasy.. what am i supposed to say to all my fans?!
ok anyway, just really happy that the extended has already ended, and its officially holiday.
i would...
finally make my IC, after some 1 month plus.
buy my new schoool term books
do 120 mathematics questions, insane?
write more nonsense on this blog.
go outings?
go for 2 chalets
2 church camps
i wished i could go to bangkok, but it clashes with dom 7 camp
slog my guts out for the church youth camp
do something, something but i dunno wat yet
ok now for the omgwtfbbq emo part.
ok some disclaimers. dont think this is you, cauz u might think so and start scuttering
to a corner after knowing how emo my "love life" is, which is actually no life.
and im not interested to hav a life in the love life, untill im well, my age times 2 minus
6?
ok here goes.
someday, i saw her, she with him, and him wasnt me. Him could have been me, but i
had decided to follow HE.
ok enough from that sentence, now for the dissection.
she is, u noe... him is, she's u noe.... HE, is God.
i dont have time for relationships,
i dont even have the mind to take it.
if i went and decided to be dumb,
to sign up for a looney crash cross....
i knew i'd
die.....
so i didnt, time isnt ripe, it isnt on my side.
if i did things by my stride,
simply for my pride, things would turn ugly,
now, if not later.
I asked God today, if i made the right choice, tears flow down
and all was clear. I did make the right choice.
i dont care if i die without having a girlfriend
i dont care if i pass without a mark of a relationship
i dont even care if i die without knowing if anyone actually wanted me
it doesnt matter, they're mere deco's on my passport
deco's i'd love to have, but yet are
as useless as any other deco's are.
so i lost, i lost her to another guy uh?
i hate to to that, but i really, will never stick a nose of a novice
into a matter of such complexity.
though i think of the choice i made as right,
i cant help but feel a little unwell
as my insides tangled in a raging fight.

i hope my choice was right, lord, watever u take away, u promised
to substitute it with yourself.
even if the circle of chance doesnt come around, Lord, have your
way.
in me.

gesage

went to the beach today, a storm was brewing, but it ceased. why?
i dunno, im not that sure, the $17 taxi trip home was nauseating, but it sure gave me the chance to reflect, and blog my usual so called nonsense on my blog. nonsense are phantasms, at least when they're on my blog, look deeper, its more than what they are, just like how a trashed newspaper gets recycled and reformed into some other paper product.
well, lets whip up a fiery demonstration of how im feeling now.
like a wave, conceived by the gigantic sea, my creation was unknown, as i grew, i finally reached a climax in my life, proudness got the better of me, and like everyone else, i'd crumble, removed as a backwash
sometime later maybe i might just make a comeback, but when would that be/? can i actually even influence the frequency of my comeback, and how much i did comeback? or would i lay rest in the ocean, waiting for another gust of passion to blow me to success? God, i really dont noe, and im feeling miserable over many things, my past haunts me, my future casts me aside. Lost and hurt, Lord please call your sheep home, and help it to listen...
and obey, for there isnt any other way.
life is more than money, never about cash, it dies away like dry ice in the desert, its about livin' this borrowed time for God, for God is everything, and as we need everything, we need nothing less than God, and nothing "more than" God.( God is everything, nothing can be more than him, if anything could be more than him, that'll be delusions, my friend..)

meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

today's afternoon, there was clearly nothing better than slacking to do.
so i guess i did think of some intricate thought.
did i do too much? cool, alot to improvise on.
do too much on wat? serving God? nahh thats impossible, well, my whole week last week was devoted to going to church and doing stuff, it may seem alot, and i sure am tired, but we can never do enough for God, we can only try our hardest, and i believe that the hectic week could have been more hectic, if only if i was willing.
do too much for exams? dont joke! i did last minute, day before kinda studying, i dunno why i was 67 in the level, probably because God wanted me to wake up by showing me that if i studied i could have rampaged my way to top positions. well, at least now i do have a reason to study harder, maybe next year i wouuld do just "do too much" for my o's and get into some top-notch JC.
do too much when im crapping? yeah i guess so, i pissed gina off today, when i was talking too much behind her during the thanksgiving service. It was the last straw when i went blurting " huh? brar? thats a nice name!" obviously i didnt mean anything clean, she turned around and gave the "bugger..." look. ouch.
well, despite being a scum that i am, God sure gave me many gifts. Isnt it just so appropriate to be typing this stuff right afterr i had my thanksgiving service? yeah of course it is appropriate, anytime, anywhere. for example, many people thought that though my face looks highly immature, ( darn you folks) my voice sounds extremely mature and beautiful through a microphone. (ok sorry, thanks) so many recommended me a job as a news brodcaster, but wth? i thought only fion will love it? haha so they said, well maybe i'd be a radio moron, sharing my views daily on air, and bringing about positive revolutions in today's appaling culture. well ok that sounds cool, im one step closer to superman afterall, if i do that.
the best gift has to be, the beautiful personalities, ok some is physical appearance ok watever!, whom God had placed beside me. OOh the thunder just went bang, there's a thunderstorm brewing, serious!
well, i wont elaborate today, cauz my computer might be in the risk of a sudden shutdown.. so.........

nppthing

ahh... after the last day of exams...
stayed at home...
ouch, that anti climax.

why? why did i hav to get some good for nothing sorethroat? lets not talk abt that, there is this.. buggerrunnynose.. ahhhhh
ok watever, exams are over, what else could be worse?
what i cant stand is, if people post abt the haze like a moron like me. no originality, heres a little quote, be cool, be hip, stay original.
WhAt? u saying that u dun wanna be cool and be hip, so u can be erm... unoriginal? well, im saying u either be cool and hip, or u go hang yourself.
darn, its still up to you, cauz if u are original, u'd hang yourself too.

i hate flaming on my own blog, ok so now lets flame on the hop.
as in blog hop and spam.

madness

can someone tell me, why is some lunatic playing happily on the computer, and smsing around when exams, like a hellish physics is blowing his way tomorrow?
well, i dunno, if i knew, i wouldnt be sitting here, typing away like a fool.
ok anyway, the haze has kinda cleared today, yesterday was like some PSI 130.. how shocking... ok i dont sound sincere, not at all, so i shall stop blogging now, and probably figure out how to sleep.

haze.. again?

ok this shitty haze is getting in my head, literally, giving me some nice headache, which is hardly nice.

first, lets see some awesome smokin' pictures.. oh damn, the pictures are taking as long as .. long? to load...

i said, " ouch" look at that!!! record breakin'! oooh the look of that makes we want to hit some indo.. shiaz.. indonesians!!! u assses man.. life's tough...

ok somemore pictures..

ok look this is overboard, u smoked the church? ok u indonesians.. i might juz... erm hm....

and just look at the building choking and groaning in pain! it really looks like its bended, this is a random aspiration.

anyway, conclusion of the day, indonesians are inconsiderate people, who only care abt slashing and cutting.

zz screw upps

cant see doesnt mean it isnt there. im a cheerful person, but im vile and hideous inside.. sounds like a.. crocodile? ok bad example.. anyway
exams were alll juz made it nonsense, so i guess i would work harder and, hopefully kick exam's butt harder.. well its hell late now, and i finished studying my geog a whopping 1 and a 1/2 hours ago, so its rather predictable why im seated infront of this computer, typing away in a manner some may regard as retard.
well thats abt all.. and u noe, well there are signs of the end of age.. well, i'll tell u why, guys... lets brace ourselves
in genesis chaper 6 verse 2 : the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful, and they married any of them they chose.
u would have guessed, a few years later, civilisations were wiped out, except noah, cauz he had his cozy little boat to ride over the floods...
how true that is, recall how u guys as in really, guys or boys watever...
just simply walk down orchard road, u would have to say "wah chio bu" for at least a hundred times if u were honest... well.. the thing is abt getting this perfect chio bu from the crowd, and not picking anyhow just because every other person is a chio bu.. in my case, im absolutely sure i made an excellent choice.. though i've no idea if she made me her choice.. LOL.. ok anyway.. watever.. the end of age is soon to come, brace yourselves...

air

its exams already, yet im being an ass, blogging now when many others are figuring how to hang themselves... why?
well llok at the sky, didnt it occur as being shitty to you? lets see, if u actually missed it, its fresh from my camera

woah.. wow u good.. u indonesians, all u can think abt are the slash and burn nonsense.. ok.. look at wat u did to our lovely sun, blocked out for good!!

yeah

God noes wat im going through.
thats the bestest benefit a human being can ever be given. When you are on the verge of snapping, feeling pissed with everything. God says, " open your eyes and look, for there are better things in life then what your stressed-up eyes can see."
and tada! i had four birthday celebrations today, of which none consists only of me. Isaac, winston, me- dont you all feel that we are darned lucky? not everyone has mass birthday celebrations, which are mutiplied by four.
first its during youth meeting. september babies were the most numerous, and we were given the warmest regards, applause and hugs and everything
second was a birthday cake that someone bought for the birthday babies, he didnt join us and didnt eat it, cauz he had a terrible day, but still, thanks joshua!
third was another birthday cake. This cake was supposed to be taken out after church youth choir yesterday. however, our choir leader had gone and forgetten abt it, so here's to it today.
fourth was a trip to tiong bahru plaza where the sec3's had batch-eat-together. we ate at KFC, and we just had fun.
it was a tiring day, doing video coverage for the launching of our chuch's 40 days of purpost thing. running around, getting infront for close-ups, straining my hands for better angles, and stressing my neurons to predict the later scenes. I wasn't briefed abt it, so i guess i didnt do a very good job, the air-con was cold, and i was shivering away like a moron. But i guess i did my best, i couldnt have done more.
so this is my prayer to God, Lord help me find my 40days of purpose handouts...i shouldnt have lost them, but i just dont really noe where they are, and i really need them to benefit from this thing.

my posts, your posts

my posts, your posts..
everyone's blog is in disaster.. pls, bring back the laughter in us... sadness written over the web, its a worldwide mourn.
why is everyone so sad? the question i have yet to answer, and unable to, not now. why?
im part of this worldwide mourning rhythm u noe... some really depressed people will scream in my tag : hey would u screw off? u noe nth abt my pain!
tag reply: no pain no gain, u shut urs up too.
hmms... ok my problem, unlike many, isnt abt stuff like EOYs, not abt stuff like others being too shitty for them, not abt betrayal, filthy backstabs, having idiots idiot-ing me, not abt insufficient money, nothing close to broken relationships, and definately not abt soggy french fries, or abt why the weather sucks today.
my problem is, me.
hav u heard this before? "hey, when u stone u look like u are depressed"
now wat abt this? " hey, whats with that "i wanna kill someone look"
well, the first one is common, the second one is me.. i cant believe it, i have to dont stone, to prevent people from thinking that i am a serial murderer. Whats that for? im just an average joe, and average joe-s dont go arnd drinking blood..
and to top this kind of things off, its lovely to have your birthday landing 2 weeks after 911 incident, havving your birthday on the 25th when your grandparents pass away on the 23rd and on the 24th.
NO BIG DEAL?! well, besides not celebrating the birthday, u dont get remembered either... and guess wat? people are actively preparing for their EOYs, their brains are jammed packed with other stuff, they juz cant rmb. note that this aint anyone's fault, just simply my fault.... well, maybe miss lim's fault?
well... its not that screwed up, after all this jazz, the most screwed up thing is, keith u are burdened with your frens burdens, and so am i
fiona u are sounding really depressed, and u are fading away.
sihui, when u didnt want the 1b people to go for the chalet, u almost gave me a reason to juz become a retard.
wenjie when u said u didnt use to like us, i realised what an asshole i was in secondary 1 and 2.
well, im sorry for jacon, keith, shuyi and everyone else who are stuck and spoiled by choice, its really tough to be mediators, its really tough, but thanks for always slogging your guts out..

woah

the terrible truth, the more u want someone to talk to you, or be with you, the less likely that would be... how true! the ironical truths always suck... sheez
ok.. study skills... well i wished it gave me someone who'd hold a knife at my throat to force me to study, but thats not wat study skills is about, its abt learning how and why u should study. i've got my reason, its because im aiming for a NUTS target which i probably never aimed for, which is to get into RJC. I've got enough of fairfield and average-ness. the fame fairfield enjoeyed had long gone. It used to be a school which didnt enjoy prestige, but had this bunch of hardworking students. AFter a batch of goons from fairfield primary started to take things for granted, the normal stream increased, from 3 classes, to 4 classes. Wth is that for u might ask, its juz there to accommodate the useless primary school students, for those who couldnt meet a mundane 188. wat a shame, and i wont plan to stay too long in a school which has its rich history scorned by the present generation.
well.. anyway, enough of the sad jazz, i got to think abt the intrument im going to make with my voice during church choir on saturday... sighzz

h

oooh theres nothing to blog, so i'd juz blog a little shitty post abt my results...
L1R5.. 18? wthhh?! but thats not the full story, its around one of the highest in class.. highlights are.... core geography -80.9 and Emath-81.3 heh heh heh..
ok it was practically juz lucky, and i didnt mention my F9-ed chinese... oooooh ouch..
ahhh.. ok thats mainly abt all.. its been uneventful recently, and everyone, almost everyone, have been eating dust.. yyyuck.
ok.. i juz wanna say that, i have to get L1R5 6 cauz i need to get into RJC.. woooh!

baahhh

well, basically, i've been going to west coast recently, and i must say, that i can climb the rope pyramid thing like anything now...
hm... well basically, there isnt anything much to blog about, since it had been frisbee-less trips, which really placed a bar over the amount of fun i could have gotten.
well, no pictures for the time being, cauz i dont have a camera, damn it i guess i'll put that on my wishlist....

ok

ok.. i've been being lazy at blogging... certain events juz are so nice to blog about, but i dont have the time and the willingness of my fingers to go along with my mental desire.. so i guess
i'll be brief.
wednesday, we went to school for teachers day celebration. after that, we had ours.. hm... we went to west coast, planned to go to the beach. but when we saw the sky, our hearts fell............................................ actually we could have gone to play lan, but well, that really wouldnt go well with any girl's opinion..... well, anyway we decided to go to the bowling centres, but we juz had to have this shower in the rain before we could reach the bowling centre... checking out the arcade on the second floor,
NO DAYTONA? again, our hearts fell, but this is a lie.
afterall it was a bowling centre, who gives a heck abt the arcade?
so,SHUYI SIHUI ALLICIA FIONA YILING JACON KEITH ROBIN CHOO ZI JIAN NAT KUEI DER ME FERNANDO JING MING! went to the beach.. hmm that sounded anti-climax.. hm.. well thats because i lifted that off someone else's blog, explaining why my name isnt the first.. hahaa ok anyway, it was merely a drizzle at the beach, the girls didnt want to wet themselves, but i was dying to do otherwise.
got really wet, it was really cold, darn the sun, it was cowering from us the whole afternoon. after our beach expedition, we went on to tiong bahru for dinner, and thanks to jacon, i got the lousy-ier carrot cake, which had poorer taste and also a smaller serving...
anyway, after that we went home, they were juz kopigatai-ing and i was juz slacking at the side, it was an extremely tired day, and of course i was tired, tooo.

next post, the doubled west coast park...
before that.. heres Sayōnara
heeeeeeee! i mean.. byeeee!

wow

long time no blog, but this is simply a random post..

math was up and down, me E math was 81. something but my Amath was like.. c6?
saturday and sunday are gonna be west coast day, as i'll be spending both days in west coast.. one with kiddies, another with people like me.. ( wait wait.... did that juz rhyme?!)
people are like crashing down all over me.. hm.. i dunno why.. but i dont feel like i actually have a reason to juz crash or break, so heres to my persistance.
life is getting dumb, one moment u've got a reason to live, another moment you're living because u have to. Thats why... we must join the purpose driven life campaign! (u can call me if u are really interested, otherwise im juz crapping cauz afterall my church is gonna have one soon...)
i feel like i want alot of money.. say.. $500? ah.. u may ask "why?" but then.. well who wouldnt want free money when they can get their hands on them, especially if its legal, say my parents give that to me which they never would, or like juz satisfy my wishlist! .. hmm.. mence i got the feeling i really want those adidas sunglasses we saw in queensway... my birthday is on 25/9 y'know...

wait.. dont tell me..

i missed that darn fun? shooot.. i'll show u wat i mean.. ( sorry for lifting and copying the picture.. hehz)

darn it.. its fop and i was at home eating dust... i could've been there.... SHIIIITTT!! ahh.. ok anyway i juz brought this up for fun...
i was juz wondering.. how come NCC like no national camp one UH? its super unfair lah... ok forget that.. my hair is growing seriously long and everything i have been saying was all so random.
well.. uh. look at their faces.. i wish i could share that smile.. instead of, again, eating dust at home.
its boring sick and disgusting, guess wat im doing? if u've guessed it right, im doing chinese hw, and guess wat? u won NOTHING!.. ok watever.. NCC was fun and friday, i felt a wee bit closer to the rest of em' and kyaking was V fun. well im going to try kyaking again in some time to come, provided that i start learning how to spell it properly....
tomorrow's physics test.. my subjects are all juz screwing themselves up.. im not happy, really.. boring, back to chinese, see ya if im not dead tomorrow....

A sinner's life.

plague by troubles, plague by sinful desires. a sinful man's life... i dont have time to sin, i dont have "credits" to sin. i've got to study, i've got to keep my convenant with God.. God help me, im no more than a sinful man, deliver me and shove me out of this life before i sink deeper into it, God saved me, God saved the day.. thank you

happy b'dae singapore!

lol, yes didnt sound excited, because i dont feel excited. frankly speaking, the british could be right that singaporeans arent excited about being loyal to the country... five years ago i would be standing infront of the TV, in sedia position, being glad and too happy to juz sing the anthem. now i entertain hesitation even as i sing the country's anthem as we assemble in the morning. well.. it cant be helped, many take things for granted, i do too, simply because im am ordinary. UH.. ok wat am i talkin' abt? i've got homework to do! ok lets take a look at the time, its 12 26 when im typing this, 0026 to be exact, its thursday morning, tomorrow would be school, and darn i haven't touched a single homework.... hheeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
friday's gonna be a hectic day, homework worries, study duties.. lol why do uniform groups have to do all e dirty jobs all the time? ahhh.. no time for such meaningless cares.

ahh... slack slack

slacking spree is finally here.. time to sit back and relax a bit.
the homework is a pile, but i dont have to worry abt it, cauz the " a pile" is an exageration.
today we had the national day celebration thing.. wasn't feeling very good, cauz the sky was uh.. cloudy and yet still abit bright and it juz gives a headache kind of aura and atmosphere.
boring boring, went to watch fast and furious tokyo drift. It was juz a plain racing movie.. cars & babes kinda thing.. well, i should have known that such movies are hardly anywhere good in terms of content, but well i watched it, afterall, most of the times we watch movies because we wanna be with our friends, and not that we actually wanna watch the movie. so i guess today was juz another sacrifice for frens kinda thing. i made several observations over the week, and last week too, that many people seem to be .. well, feeling low and stuff like that? like i said before, its infectious, and i thnk i've caught the "feel low" disease already.. ahhh... ok anyway, looking forward to the fireworks tomorrow!! till then,
flloowoooooooooooooo!

hmmm....

heh.. was lazy, so, didnt update for almost the whole week... but this week's got hardly anything to write abt, except that my thumb and my palm hurts when im typing all this because the muscle there has a 98% tendency to "mini" cramp. ahhh... this sucks...
well founder's day has super distasteful, cause we had to clap for almost 200 people.. if not more. boring...
ahh.. played to much lan... my wallet's got a hole... hm.. till here i guess, since like i said, im being lazy here

now wat abt the alt-ctrl-delete and end task?

now wat abt the alt-ctrl-delete and end task?

if life was but a computer, the first think i'd end task would be homework.

homework is rather distracting, homework is boring, it sucks, its distasteful.

the second thing i would end task would probably be human relationships. while they're fun and nice when they turn out well, they drive you to your grave when they dont turn out well. then again, running away is nothing close to a solution, its better to take pain in blasts sometimes.

ahh.. it never gets better, this afternoon, i juz didnt feel great, my mum yelled at me, recalling abt previous unhappy events such as not being friendly with my classmates, my NCC mates juz really, weighed me down. i guess running away isnt anything good, but can i juz take a break?

at the end of the day,
though sometimes is so much better to let go,
but only through trials do we really learn
the facts of life, the merciless insights.
i guess i'll take my break, till
im ready to start all over again. Everyone's tired
hanging too tight, would break your bones
letting go, could be a
better way to overcome your woes,
im gonna do that, what about you
wat would u choose?

dont we really wish, that we could juz click ctrl-z?

sometimes when we make mistakes, we really wish we could juz press ctrl-Z. hn.. however in life there aint no keyboard
there is a control button
there is a Z key.
but when u click them both, u juz sink deeper into misery. why?
things arent meant to be left hanging in the air. things arent meant to be left unpatched. i thank sir joel for acting as a mediator to help me patch my scarred ties with the rest of the NCC members. its non of his business, really, but yet he bothers. thinking that its no big deal? well wrong! when a mediator does a bad job, he gets bloody murder screamed in his face, whacked both sides. impressed now? thanks joel.

however that was not all it was gonna be, today something great happened. then all was lost when a cryptic sentence was mentioned, which i caught while he hanged in the air, slowly dissipating, leaving me a utter confusion. i guess i'd like to explain, but who would lend me their ears, think abt it, if u were in my shoes, wouldnt u juz wanna press, rewind?
i dont say it, doesnt mean i dont want it.
i cant take it, for better things to come
i gave up my opportunity at hand. u are made
for me, and i am made for u, now it doesnt feel,
the way it felt before.
if it was a farewell sonata, do u wanna see my tears?
but if a smile is wat u want, guess i'll still give u my all
just like how i did before.
since a long time ago,
yesterday, today, and forever more.

my dear blog almost died.

hm... havent blogged for a long time, so heres to the revival..
gosh, geog is a confusing bunch of gibberish to me.. confusing nonsense fused together. we won our debate. obviously MASS media wasnt responsible for the deterioration in the social values of modern societies.... and we beat them hands down... hehehe.. but, band D wont be making it into the finals, because band E bagged two victories, for us, 1 only.. isnt that sad?ZZZ.. ok anyway.. tiredd, blog another day, i'll be backk...

hm.. i guess we juz know it ourselves

nothing's doing... getting a new phone soon, but as u can sense from the mood integrated in this sentence, im not really very excited, cauz the phone would juz be some thing good enough to shut me up.
something funny, we lost our debate.. why? u sure u wanna noe?
i guess its the teacher's and the judge's fault... although our side was stand was highly unfavourable, we put on a really great fight, and i dare say our points were way stronger, and obviously backed up with strong support. the other parties points were super numerous, but yet, they left all their points hanging in the air. AND I MUST SAY, I COULDNT STAND JESSICA AND BAOXIAN bitching away, its true we must provoke the opposition during a debate, but not by metamorphing the entire place into a gossip parlour where people juz sit around and sound out gossips by conjuring the most disgusting voice they could ever muster.. people, its a debate, not bitching session, wake up, dont let this happen if we see u all in the finals. ZZZZ.. next topic is also, again, unfavourable. we're suppose to oppose the fact that mass media is responsible for the degrading of moral values.. ZZZ lucks is always on the opponent's side... why?

nothing much.. lol dota exploits..

tada!
ok lets see.. this few days have been rather boring.. losing dotA matches, getting into petty quarels... lets see a picture of me and mence ganking lennard and keith in their fountain..
ok watever, its not so exciting, look at the amt of "miss" at the fountain...
and anyway, keith died already, and lennard died really quick.. haha
OWNAGE!?

ok church camp isnt going on verywell.. had a mini meeting today, got kinda criticised like nuts, and we altered the plan to their liking, got out, and got scolded again, because apparently our original plan was more preferable.. ZZZ... wat the hell...

look on the bright side,
NAPFA is gonna be GOLD
math test marks are gonna be sky high.
i can kinda control the amt of money i use everyday better, for short, management...

ok....

today, as i saw a new msn windown appear, a thought came to my mind.. " ok ok, which hottie juz added me on msn?"
to my chocking horror, and untter disgust, it was THE GAY ZESTIN!!! taaddaaa.. thinking of the past encouunter with darth t**t*s, a ripple of chill crept down my spine. Wat's his business now, coming back? ... revenge? back for his "girl friend"? ( which i figured out was no possible)
hm.. digusting, i'lll leave this thought at the backyard of my brain, and think abt it some other time...

tomorrow's math test, apparently the test seems to be going to be really easy, but then again, proudness comes before a fall...
NCC.. ah.. boring, no gym, no post no money to buy snacks... ZZZZ... borrriinnggg tomorrow got 3 photoshoots, NCC, followed closely, media.
then of course there is the one for the school hottesst guy ( which is not true, so it boils down to 2 photoshoots)
ok just a random quote: once churchhill was drunk, a lady who thought that he was drunk, went and told him so. turning around, churchhill said," u madam however is ugly, whereas for my condition, it'll be over next morning, u however, will still be ugly."
wasnt that interesting?
yet, interesting stuff, could probably be yet another
phantasm of life... ZZZZ

that word brought me fear.. why? its juz the over open kinda style, what the, how did he... wat the hell?
and im juz sitting down in my comfort zone, taking things for granted, whispering to myself, sacrificed must be made, but better things to come...
easily said than done... it could be so much more fun, if i could just talk, so much more fun if i dont have to pull myself back...

arggh.. watever, am i supposed to care? but i cant juz dont care. cauz
im feeling alone,
for this confusion,
aint leavin me so..
trying to have fun,
fooling around where i shouldnt,
cracking a pun,
it didnt sound well,
maybe i should juz ,
run away from it all..


run.. run.. run..
sounds like wat im gonna do on thursday, running back on the similar avenue, life's juz running back again, back again...
2.4, i've taken it before, somehow, i'd be taking it again
there's no need to explain, he had the upper hand,
i lost my records, u can run or juz break down and sob..




ahhah i was juz joking, life's not that tough... its juz the hw today i guess..
for every bad thing, there's always a thousand pleasant stuff to work towards, with 1/5 of my life gone, this isnt the time to sit around and complain, not the time to cower up in a corner, its life, afterall, it'd be in history soon, and
another phantasm revealed...

ok well done, the smarty blogger spell check ruined my previous post.... arrgh slap blogger.. ok anyway, church anniversary went on quite well..
we went swensens after the whole thing, and party till.. ten?


tiredd... hungry.. blogger ate my post and i've
got no post to devour. isnt that IMBA-ishly unfair?

its been 40 years, yet, isit because im chinese speaking, isit because im a methodist, or isit because im situated in queenstown, which makes me who i am?
no no of course not, im a church, with worship sevices.. err... im afraid thats all.
what if im gonna shift, say to ang mo kio, what if i have decided to abandon chinese? or, what if i have decided to convert into a presbyterian? So, if that happens, am i still, me?

that serie of thoughts, added with a tune, was presented today. I hope it'll cause the people to reflect and ponder, about what is makes our church our church, what indentifies our church and makes it unique.( i hope its not the complacent elderlies, not the indifferent adults, and the youths who arent sure what they're doing in church)


ok anyway... here's wat i call fellowship, building of bonds quickly over the course of 2 days, when everyone is unfamiliar with anyone else... impressive? we're already a BIG family!



that is the CAC folks, thats right, chinese annual conference, youths. maybe about 5% of the total amt, heh, big enough or not? can find me or not?

haiz..

NCC was rather boring today, before that, i must mention about my A math test... it was horrid, and i flunk the whole darn thing... hehz.. it was on functions, however, i really didnt remember anything about it. NCC was well.. quite fun though, considering its my first time slacking.. but i didnt get to go gym.. cauz it was too packed..
and well, if u slacked too much, u'd juz get punished very hard, which happened to us, in case no one actually knew, my batch if one hell of a failure bunch, which just disgraced the school's good reputation by returning with only 6 2nd sergeants.

ah.. today was rather boring.. think abt it,3 a math periods... ah.. but..
my group won the class debate!! wooo! we're going to challenge the other classes soon..isnt this exciting or wat?
haha.. ok anyway, let me repeat, this is my first blog ever and.. hm.. isnt it nice or wat?
can i have more tags on the board?

tomorrow is class and media photoshoot... thursday is NCC photoshoot...
ahh.. so much crap, when's the interclass games gonna start? cant wait to win the other classes in frisbee..
till here..

woohoooo! finally, my blog

ok.. i dont noe exactly wat to say, this is merely a test.. hehz