That's it, I believe I've let myself fall far enough. Here it is, it's time to stop. It's time to relax and let go.
I do hope for something more sustainable while I'm waiting... instead of getting repeatedly involved in this cycle...
Anyway, have I ever mentioned how I feel my life is this huge parody?
How shall I be playing Jesus/God in the lover's discourse? I feel I'm incredibly far from that.
I'm the kind of guy who's always with the wrong partner. I'm not the heroic guy who restores the lives of people by being with them. I'm none of that.
In fact, deep in my mind, I've always wanted to write a song to capture this tension... An optimistic song for once. Of how I sought for love outside, and how God's love (eventually) captures my imagination and me.
But oops, i don't really have song writing skills at my disposal. Though I'm certain that when the day of captivity comes, I will write it, I will write it because it'll be my testimony.
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