what I think about missing my philo paper

first and most importantly, I want to say
"Sorry Lord, it's just really telling about how I treat my studies. I am without excuse at all. Please forgive me."

Then there are the wise advices to S/U it or take MC. S/U is really muddy now. So many mixed opinions about it. Some say faculty modules cannot be S/U-ed, some say that only major mods cannot be S/U-ed. My take? This will be the most painless way to resolve this.

MC? Well MC is really something I won't do. I don't deny how tempting it was when someone suggested that I might not be able to S/U it after all. I was really tempted, in fact, desperately considering it.
But phew, am I glad God won out. For you dear Lord, for you I refuse.

Finally, I worry about people looking at my decision as though I were a martyr paying the price of righteousness. If any, I see it as I'm paying the price for my folly. There is nothing admirable or noble here. It's just me knowing not to compound my mistakes, to conceal a sin with another.

If I may, treat this as a post-script.
I express disappointment in all the Christians who asked me to take MC.

I mean, I think I need you guys to berate me for being forgetful and encourage me to be faithful.
Please honour God too, if this ever happens to you.